shorter and bolder

February 3, 2016

I take my hair very seriously.

Hair is not just hair. It is also part of identity and self-expression as our personal style is. Our hair is an element of our overall image. It creates the bigger picture, which is Us.

Does that make any sense?

I have a long face – parts that resemble an oval, but then I have faint cheekbones that offset the oval shape to be a square. I recently discover that I have a “squoval.” When it comes to finding a cut that is flattering to this mixed shape, you can imagine how nervous I get when I see my hairstylists.

I feel bad for Stacie and Marlo, because I am particular with every detail. But at the same time, I trust their judgment and say, “Do what you think looks good.” My tip for you is if you are changing a look, I say go on Pintrest and collect styles that inspire your future look. It has always been in my favor and fortunate enough that my hairstylists are receptive.

When you are someone like me, who has had long hair for all of her life, you best believe cutting more than 6inches off was quite the transition and nervous experience. I have anxiety issues, okay? Now, almost at twenty-six, it is up to my neck. The shortest I have ever had it in my life. Well, maybe I did have the Asian-bowl-cut, but I don’t recall any photos as proof of this.

It’s shorter and I feel bolder. A haircut can change a woman. 

But let me say this, in my journey in creating my personal style and identity, I believe now more than ever, I have truly capture my sense of style and what genuinely represents me. You know what also helped me in defining my style? My capsule wardrobe, which I will share what pieces I have been heavily rotating. It would be inspiration if you ever want to embark this challenge, or what I like to say: lifestyle.

Now, selfies for you! HAHA!

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K, bye!

– C

never on a diet

January 29, 2016

Most of the time, I feel hostile in my environment. 

It should not have to be this way. Maybe it is I work in fashion and media, and I am a woman. My body type is necessarily the norm in the industry nor in the Asian community.

You often see magazine spreads of White, slim and slender women, with the exception of a few Black and Asian models. You are probably tired of reading everything about body-shaming, equally for men and women.

I understand the annoyance when you come across these type of articles. Imagine working in an environment saying things like, “I am giving up carbs.” First off, why would you ever do that? Secondly, is this a lifestyle change or are you just dieting for a wedding next week? I get it, though.

Healthier choices. 

I totally respect those who have the drive to go everyday and want to become better physically, but please do not food shame me. Let me enjoy my damn egg and cheese pumpernickel bagel, in peace, please. You don’t see me preaching in your ear how carbs are so important and how bagels run the World.

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I used to be so strict with diet and workout regime, in hopes that I will shed away to be a size 0, but who am I kidding? My outlook on health and wellness is vastly different than my pre-mature acceptance days. I feel like my approach to health and fitness is making sure I have endurance, flexibility and strength. Getting a workout in is priority and my goal is to go five times a week (a mixture of strength training and yoga), but I don’t have to deprived myself from beer and pizza to have a certain body type.

Never.

I am human, so there will be days when I am not feeling my absolute best – read: feeling fat. I will adjust my nutrition, but my usual intake is fairly healthy – you guys see my food all the time via instagram. I always make sure my meals are balanced with protein, greens and carbs. Mind you, fat is absolutely not a feeling, in case you don’t know.

I am average, or whatever you classify a size 7-8 in women’s is? I have always had “a little extra” as mentioned on OKCupid when categorizing body types. Yeah, that’s real. 

And I am okay with that. 

It took me a long ass time to accept my body as is, but continue to work in areas that I am not one-hundred percent confident in. This is part of my whole self-love journey (:

K, bye!

– C

 

 

brooklyn studio apartment

January 24, 2016

I have not felt home for a long time; since living in Fullerton, probably. Now, Brooklyn is definitely home. In March, it will be one year since I moved into my studio apartment. (The best present I could ever give myself!)

Remember how I mentioned it took me a long time to get settled in? Yeah. About damn time. I kid you not, I had a mattress and bookshelf for months before I purchased anything else. It was not until November when I began filling my apartment with little additional details, like frames and art, that represents me – ultimately, coming to life.

The best part in this entire process was how I was going to furnish and decorate the place. I knew I wanted to go for the Scandinavian-bohemian-chic vibe.

I was inspired by photos I found on Pintrest; I can spend hours there and curate beautiful boards, but I don’t have that much time. In case you are interested, you can view my inspiration boards here, here, and here.

I will shut up now. Family and friends, I present to you, my studio apartment – my home. 

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Sometimes I forget I live by myself, but when I remember or take a moment to reflect, I am so thankful that my life has turned out this way.

I will always be proud of this accomplishment. This is me adulting. 

– C

PS: I had time yesterday to edit and write this up because you know, I was snowed in and all. It was nice just to stay in and Netflix. However, after a few hours, I already went crazy…

Small World, James

January 20, 2016

I always find it so strange and rare when I run into people in New York.

I am beginning to feel that the World is getting smaller and smaller. Kind of creepy. New York is the number one on the most populated cities in the United States.

So what are the odds, right? Well, not odd enough. For me, anyway.

On the occasions I have ran into familiar faces, they have been not-so-pleasant-encounters. This has happened to me on three separate occasions, randomly. 

This is just one of the stories – that happened last night.

Here I am, trying to find a place to grab a quick dinner before a show. I’m in the West Village, a neighborhood I don’t frequent too much for eateries. I was going through Yelp, and got too cold to go anywhere else, so I decided to settle for tacos. It’s a Tuesday after all.

There is this taco shop that I dined at my second day in New York with Iris, a small underground place. It is literally called “The Taco Shop.

As I asked for a table for one, the gentleman begins to walk me towards the back of the small shack. I see a guy dining by himself. 

Great, two lonely people. Maybe we will strike a conversation. He looks kind of cute, actually. I get closer, and closer.

Why does this guy look so familiar? Holy shit, can it be?

“James*?!”

He looks up and we are both in shock that we ran into each other. Of all taco shops in the City… We randomly came across this one?!

He asked me to sit across from him as he is finishing up his meal and picking up his check. Then he bluntly said, “Are you stalking me because I didn’t text you back?”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” I say boldly back. After a bantering for a few minutes, he kissed my head farewell. We embrace and that was it.

The entire time, I am in shock that this was all happening. I am sitting across from a guy I used to casually date, and we ended on not-so-great terms.

He blocked me on instagram, actually. That’s how I knew he kind of hated me. Salty.

As I enjoyed the rest of dinner, I couldn’t help, but wonder why does this shit always happens to me? Of all people and places, I somehow manage to run into guys I’ve dated. Everywhere. Trust me, I haven’t dated a large percentage of New York City.

What is the Universe saying? Tell me, friends. I am curious to know.

Goodnight!

*name has been changed to somewhat protect identity.

#latestylepost: downtown vibes

January 7, 2016

You can tell this outfit was captured awhile ago.

It is officially winter in New York, we’ve been blessed with such a warm December. I wish it was sunny as it was in these photos. So depressing, also, my hair. Look at the length of it! I kind of miss it, but I love the short thing I got going on. Random side note: when I did a middle-part with my wavy locks tucked behind my ears, I called it my Alexander Wang hairstyle.

Don’t know my reference? Please see below:

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So what’s so unique about this outfit in comparison to my everyday-wear? Well, it has to do with the elements that screams Downtown. Leather, sneakers, and long, draped shirt – I am wearing pants underneath! Or maybe this squeals New York…?

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Yes, this is a very New York shot. Thanks to my photographer aka Work Wifey, Karina.

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It is not a dress, although I could have fooled you. It’s a tunic/shirt. With side slits and reveal an innocent view of my side body. I have never been a fan mixing navy and black, but as of late, I grew fond of the color pairings. Especially if the navy is dark enough to appear black.

Mixing solids and patterns, as basic styling principles, and playing with lengths and fabric textures (cotton and leather). This look is very easy to duplicate! It is definitely out of what I would typically wear – mixing my everyday favorite bottoms and leather jacket with a this tunic.

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Signing off with my favorite picture.

I have so much back-up photos to share with you all because I suck in real-time photo sharing, except on Instagram.

– C

livin’ good, feelin’ better

January 6, 2016

Ah, hello 2016. 

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Right before the Holidays, there was a calmness wave that crept on me. A lot of clarity and my soul felt as ease, which does not happen often because I am quite your anxious character.

In Season Five of Sex and The City, Carrie said, “In New York, they say, you’re always looking for a job, a boyfriend or an apartment.”

Well, Carrie you have a point. Most New Yorkers are looking for one of the three or all three, but let’s apply those questions personally.

Am I looking for a job? Yes, but not aggressively. Am I looking for an apartment? Naaah, I love my Brooklyn studio apartment. What about a boyfriend? Had one, so does that count? But if you cannot accept that answer, my answer is no. I am not looking for a boyfriend, thank you.

Okay, maybe she did or did not have a point, but either way, it is the first time in New York where I finally feel settled in because my time in New York has been a continuous State of Transition. 

It feels really good for a change. I don’t recall the last time I’ve felt this way. I suppose we all define settled in differently because even though I secured a job and an apartment, it still did not feel complete or calm about it.

I signed a lease to my apartment last March – I told you guys in this post right here. It was unfurnished forever. If you came over, it seemed like I just moved in when in reality I have been there for over half a year. But towards the end of 2015, the vibe was new – it felt like a home and lived-in. I held off publishing a piece about my studio because it was unfurnished, but I think it is time for a potential tour? What do you think?

As for work, I have had a total of four jobs since I moved to New York – four jobs in a Year and a Half. You do the math. Last year, I jumped over many hurdles in all spectrums in my life and my emotions were high and low extremes.

It was bat-shit crazy. I was crazy – well, still am.

I am sure you have your own encounters where when it rains, it pours. Or you are in this constant phase of jumping to-and-fro. You don’t get to ride the smooth wave. You ask yourself when you will ever catch a break?

You will, I promise. The crazy shit always comes first, to challenge you and see if you can fight back. Kind of testing your resilience. If you can win that fight then you’s a survivor, baby! You better go celebrate! I guess that is the moral of the story here.

As I am easing my way into 2016, there are a lot of positive vibes in the air. The newness.

I have not felt like myself since the Year began because I have been super low-key and sick. However, yesterday I was on a high – got a good night’s rest and woke up feeling like a total #GirlBoss and went to Yoga after work. It felt great!

I’m back, baby! 

Anyway, I should probably get back to work now. Thank you all for reading! I owe you a lot of stories (and content) (;

I am eager to share the upcoming projects I have been quietly working on!

– C

PS: I hope you all rang in the New Year fabulously! Cheers!

 

2016: The Year of Intention

December 10, 2015

As we are slowly approaching the end of 2015, I am getting into the reflection and goals-setting mindset. Never too early for that, even when we have around twenty more days left of the year.

We are in December and so many things has happened since January. I wanted to take the time to look at my shortcomings and success I faced this year. (My close friends, Desiree and JC, already heard some of this during this past weekend).

Although I am not one dwell so much on the past because well, it’s a major distraction on the present, I am huge advocate when it comes to journaling reflections. There is a satisfaction in this process; I like to see where I can make improvements and progress as a person and in my professionalism.

I find myself having the same goal, which is to be a better version of myself than I was yesterday. The entire theme of 2015 was to be better, because I don’t believe in the whole New Year, New Me cliche bullshit.

For 2016, I’m calling it the Year of Intention(s) because I have found that if you throw your intentions and desires out into the Universe, somehow, there is a response. Usually a great one from what I’ve witnessed. It’s The Secret, and it has changed my life since I have cultivated this practice.

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One of my favorite quotes by Paulo Coelho is:

And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

What are my “somethings?? Let me share with you because I love, love, goal-setting:

  1. Stay true to myself. This is vague, but I felt that there were some parts of this year where I would make myself believe I wanted something or am something, when I am not. I cannot pretend anymore.
  2. Do everything with intention.
  3. Make serious strides in my career. Find a position in the editorial/publishing company.
  4. Continue to hone my voice and craft. Pitch to Huffington Post Women because now, I finally feel ready. I have been timid all year and battling my writing insecurities, but now, I am ready. I feel good about my craft. It is good enough. I am good enough.
  5. The key to success in my book is consistency. I hope to continue to be consistent in all spectrums of my life: health and fitness, read, volunteer, wellness, write, and cultivate and maintain my relationships.

While I reviewed my goals I set for myself this year, I have to say this was a year of being better as I hoped for it to be. I have accomplished so much and there were so many highs. So many! A few were:

  1. Moved into my studio apartment in Brooklyn
  2. Got published on new platforms such as TNF and Literally Darling
  3. Began working at such an amazing company with an inspirational boss at Factory PR.
  4. Made new, authentic friendships and strengthening my current relationships
  5. Learned how to manage my expectations of people and life, generally
  6. Learned that I am able to connect with someone on a romantic level, again
  7. Becoming the woman I am today – I fucking love me! 

I continue to learn a lot about myself, and I am thankful for everything that has happened despite the nasty shit. I came out alive.

I feel good about life, guys. I really do!

Here is my early farewell to this year. I wanted to post this early one because I won’t have time later this month due to visitors and traveling out of state for the holidays. I know, I am escaping the City for awhile. Don’t miss me much (;

I will pop in here-and-there, maybe?

I wish everyone Happy Holiday season (and see you all next year, ha)! Wait! Can you share some of your goals with me? You know that if you write them down or share your goals, you are more likely to accomplish them? Yessss, please shareeee!

love,
C

personal: do you want ketchup?

December 8, 2015

You know how the saying goes about living in large cities, filled with people yet you feel so alone? I never knew how that felt or understood the concept, but now I have endured it often. It comes in waves, and the stronger waves hit during the holiday season when I realize that I don’t have family 30-minutes away.

But I am so glad and extremely thankful that there are people who are great friends, who have become family that welcome me with open arms to celebrate with. I think that is why I love New York so much; there is a sense of community and I don’t know, it feels nice to be belong somewhere.

Because I am always late when it comes to posting in real-time, here is what happened:

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The beautiful thing about Thanksgiving is, no none really leaves the City because plane tickets or travels are too damn expensive. There were stranglers around this time, and we got together and made ourselves a feast! I’ve always enjoyed cooking with people, and this was super fun! Thank you for hosting, Gina and Kristen (:

I am still recovering from a weekend of non-stop laughter! Definitely a weekend to remember and to be preserved until the next time I get to connect in real-life with my babes. Of all the nights, my favorite night was our first night. We ordered Chinese take-out and caught up on life, then off to drinks and karaoke with mutual friends. Ugh, so much fun! I lost my voice – now I have this sexy, raspy thang goin’ on (;

I love when family and friends come into town. Not only it is an excuse for me to eat whatever I want and explore new places. I love this season especially – New York is beautifully decorated with the holiday spirt! However, it is very exhausting playing host.

Thank you so much for making an impromptu trip to visit me, babes! (I am sure you will be reading this) Fair warning, many selfies will follow below:

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While I am sure (or maybe not?) you all have seen my instagram posts all weekend – being super unapologetic about this.

I am trying to preserve my energy when my sister comes in later this week. So that will be all for now. For instant updates, head over to Twitter and/or Instagram (:

K, bye!

en route to rediscovery

November 29, 2015

Sometimes, you just need a fresh start. A new beginning. A clean slate. Just get rid of everything going wrong and make it go right. Sometimes, you need to delete a number. Color your hair. Quit your job. Purge all the negative things and focus on all the positive. Just do it. – The Importance of Starting Over

This month, November, was filled with moments of self-rediscovery.

IMG_3953copyNot that my previous relationship was a relationship where one loses a sense of self and the person I was dating was my everything. Not remotely – it was very much an adult relationship and I remained independent. But I did lose sight of certain things, such as doing things that brought me genuine happiness and the detailed qualities and characteristics I admired in a potential partner.

It was my fault, I romanticized Him and our relationship.

Now, shifting gears and focusing on the present.

  1. I chopped off 6+ inches off my hair. I feel like a whole new woman. 
  2. I am cultivating new lady friendships. This is something I am a huge advocate for. After all, I need to focus on laying my roots here in New York because let’s be honest, I am not going back to the West Coast any time soon. This girl needs and wants girlfriends.
  3. I am taking a lot time to channel my emotions into my writing and to look within myself. Identify patterns and looking at the relationship in retrospect.
  4. Snowballing off from No. 3, I am exploring new writing opportunities. I think it’s time to shift my focus to my writing, again, and continue to connect with my amazing readers – like You!
  5. I go to Yoga 2-3 times a week for many reasons, but one to strengthen my Spiritual practice.

This is how I am embarking my new beginnings, in baby steps. I will say when you are surrounded by great people, your hardship doesn’t seem so bad. I have such an amazing support system, who all affirmed that I will be okay.

And I am. I feel better, and definitely, in better Spirits. It feels great to feel like yourself, again. 

One last thing, thank you all so much for your kind words, encouragement, and your ongoing support. I know I say this a lot, but it is the truth!

The best part of being a writer is when your intention is to write for yourself, as a creative outlet and as an expression, but you manage to create a piece that connects with people from all over. I have received a tremendous feedback from my article that was published on Literally Darling.Very pleased to hear that I captured the very emotions you and I felt.

Ugh, thank you so much!

with great love,
C

go celebrate yoself

November 20, 2015

Hello!

*chimes in Adele’s Hello.

I am trying to do this thing where I only write to you when I have a quality and compelling story to share because well, do you want me to spam your newsfeed? Nah, right? Okay, cool.

It’s Friday afternoon-almost-evening, and I never stay this late in the office on a Friday. But surprisingly today is one of those days. In the midst of the busyness of this week, I hit a lot of wins. #winning 

I didn’t grow up with getting gold stars and pats on my back for 100 percent on my math homework – well, for starters, math was never my strongest subject. Second, my parents were stoic then. Always questioned why I didn’t work harder.

But I felt like I did. Now, as an adult, I have taken strides in my career and I’m very proud of myself. I learned to recognize my strengths and accomplishments. Is it narcissistic if I celebrate myself and my successes? Um, no. I feel like it is my birthday every other week because I am killing it at work. It is like #treatyoself every so often – when I know I truly deserve it.

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I believe in recognizing when a job is well done. Don’t you? Give yourself a pat on the back. Get that damn cupcake!

Why I firmly believe in celebrating myself is because if I don’t, who will? So, go celebrate the things in your life, from the small to the big successes and Yourself. Only you have the power to measure the value of your success.

Today, I celebrate myself. Why? Well, I do regularly, but this week I had a major win. I pitched a profound, personal story to the Editor in Chief at Literally Darling. This outlet is like Elite Daily, but more intellectual and geared towards a women demographic. The reach is huge, so this is something worth squealing about!

The article goes live on Monday, November 23rd. I am still in shock by the way. Ugh, I cannot believe it’s happening. 

This is one of my stronger pieces with a help of a good friend. I have been working on this the last few days – poured my heart and soul into this that exposes a whole other side of me that I rarely share with you all…

“I just got out of a relationship. I fell in love for the first time in five years.”

– C