parenting done right

January 21, 2015

I never acknowledged how great and amazing my parents are.

You know how we see great celebrity parenting with The Jolie-Pitts allowing their daughter Shiloh to dress in a suit and allowing children to express themselves however they want to? I am so fortunate that my parents allow that for my siblings and I. Tattoos, piercings, chopping off extreme hair lengths and all forms of self-expression is welcomed in my household.

Yeah, growing up was like any other Asian household. You must get those good grades, you cannot associate with “bad” people, don’t get pregnant, and all this other crap. Although I grew up in a dysfunctional community, in other words: ghetto, somehow my siblings and I all grew up sheltered and pretty awesome.

I do not know where there was a shift in their parenting and viewpoint, but definitely there was.For the most part, my parents have become open-minded in many things and how they approach their parenting.

I chatted it up with my parents last night, and it dawned on me how liberal they are and how much freedom I have had growing up. They never pushed me towards marriage, especially at this age where I am in my mid-twenties. I know for a fact that my parents love that I put relationships and dating at the bottom of my priority list. Sure, growing up my Mom tried shoving some career in the medical field down my throat, but I was too much of a brat and stubborn to take any of that into consideration.

From being inexpressive and unaffectionate to saying “I love you” and willing to give and receive hugs. Now, if you are unfamiliar with the Asian Culture, some are closed off to that sort of thing; some Asian cultures do not express emotions or are affectionate towards one another. Do not ask me why. Last night might have been the first time I ever heard my Dad say he loves me. I know, as cheesy as that may sound, but the man is stoic. I was always afraid of hugging him growing up, and to this day, I always ask before I dive in because I do not want to invade his personal space, haha.

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As I was expressing how fortunate I am to have their unconditional support, they realized how grown up I have become. Yesterday’s FaceTime was the first time both openly told me how proud they are of me! Glad I am doing something right. I am getting teary-eyed while writing this.

Is there a moral of this story I am sharing? Maybe. Maybe not. You know how sometimes we always think our parents are kill-joys and never understand us? The key to any successful relationship is communication. There may be so many factors involved that hinders thorough communication such as language barriers and/or generation gaps, but really try to understand where they are coming from and they will do the same for you. It truly takes time to build a solid relationship with our parents.

I love the relationship that have fostered between my parents and I. Although distance does play a huge influence in why we are great now, even when I lived at home shortly after graduation, I learned to appreciate them so much. Now? I am even more appreciative. Don’t think I can over-express that and how fortunate I am to be their wild child.

My bottom line is: if I ever choose to become a parent one day, I would execute similar parenting skills like my parents did. That is what I call parenting done right.

Wow, this is such an emotional post. Thank you for reading family and friends! I need to sleep… To the kiddies if you’re reading this – can you give Mommy and Dad a hug for me? Google Hangout soon! Miss you!

– C