not mia, just focused

September 18, 2016

I remember there was a specific time frame in college, where I was busy doing me, and I got a lot of shit from other people. Shit like:

Why you so MIA? 

I was just focused, obsessed maybe, with doing well in all categories in my life. That meant excelling in my academics and graduating by my goal-date, contributing to organizations, my internship (which did catapult my fashion career), and working part-time at the student recreation center, all while trying to obtain some fitness regime.

I rarely had time to go to social gatherings – or what I used to say: “fuck shit up” with my friends. I just had different priorities then, and I still do now. But back then, I carried this guilt with me. I always felt bad that I couldn’t attend a mixer, or participate in fun things because I obviously knew I had to study, work, or take a trip back to Pomona to visit my family. Trust me, I had a strong case of the FOMO before the term was even established.

I remember going to Downtown Fullerton while there were deadlines and other pressing matters to attend to. But I was young, wild, and cared too much about peoples’ opinions of me then.

But what is much different now compared to then is the guilt that was with me is utterly gone. Now, when I am working on something for thecnnekt, but missing on the latest party in Brooklyn, I don’t feel bad.

The great thing about growing up is giving less fucks. Seriously. 

My desire to go out and stay out late is nonexistent. My priorities have changed a lot, and my ass is more on the line than my wild college years (Circa 2009 – 2011) because well, I am adult now. There is no guilt and shame when I say, “I can’t make it” or “I don’t want to go out tonight.”

I am doing me – just focused on being a better version of myself right now and tunnel vision about my goals.

So, I understand why people are being MIA – they’re just busy doing them. S’all good.